I haven't always been, but I am now. I have always had a love/hate relationship with food: I love it because when I am eating I am happy, I hate it because after I finish I feel ugly. I am tired of feeling ugly. I suppose the bingeing started in September of 2009 when my brother was hit by a car and killed. I found the best way to ignore the pain, was to eat until I hurt.
Food has taken over my life. I always think about it. I always want it. I am letting it control me. After 1,000,000 "I will start my diet tomorrow," I now really mean it.
I am going to blog, perhaps only speaking to myself, as a way to stick to my weight loss plan. I will blog when I feel weak and that I might binge and I will blog when I am proud of my willpower. I am down to my last hope. I need to change my life.
Today I am 20 years old, 5'6" and 160 lbs.
My goal is to reach 125 lbs by June. 35 pounds. I can do it.
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